Monday Jan 7 12 : Just sitting down to post a quick update don’t really know why I’m doing it. Today’s events included a worker getting a finger crushed and slashed open and having to go in for stitches. I asked him later whether he had pink one or blue ones, ‘stitches I mean,’ he proudly replied blue, so I said good! Boy stitches! That means you can come to work tomorrow. I’ll be there he said. I knew he would. Jacks a worker, and he loves to work. Jack comes to us from Nova Scotia A former fisherman and a pretty good guy. Trading in his sea legs for the biggest Quad in America at this time.
Anyway back to the battle. Its been a hard year already. 1st week into it. I don’t know how to say this so I’ll just try I’m pretty ill right now and as so often happens I can’t imagine how I am going to live and most days I feel like I will certainly die for sure by morning. I’m never scared of dying nearly as much as losing control of my life in terms of earning a living, and actually making decisions regarding things that normal people don’t even think about. I talked to a druggist yesterday who told me that I would have to take 4 times the amount of meds that I take to control the pain I suffer, I said that I wasn’t willing to do that, I think I surprised him with that response, but drugs have never been an answer for me other than Tylenol. So now I’m wondering about bed time and what will happen tonight. Thinking about the battle and wondering who’s gonna win, or if I will ever shake this disease off long enough to have – I mean hope for a normal life. I was thinking about the Book I’m writing The Rock, and that, well should I finish it, cause I’ll just start another one if I do.
I live every day as if it were my last, and many times every minute as if it were my last, and often pray that it were my last and i wish, I wish I could share what it’s like to such an extent that some one some where would stand up and Rock every boat on the political waters of Canada, and America for people who have Chronic Fibromyalgia and get us some real help. and afford us some mercy, kindness and compassion.